I am sure that many of you without children grow sick of hearing about other people’s children. And how much work it is. And how tired we are. And how we have had to clean up human feces more times than you have even had to think about it. Blah, blah, blah.
I am sure you grow tired of these things and you want to get back to living your own life. Your glorious life of doing whateverthehellyouwant. You wonder why people even choose to have children in the first place. Why would you give up freedom to be chained to a 3 foot tall dictator?
I have been pondering this question as I have been in severely close quarters with my own little minions for a few months now. I have no break in sight as JW is back and forth to Italy and Vance isn’t enrolled in a preschool this year. My work load has increased as I have started homeschool activities with him to make sure he is ready for Kindergarten in a few years. Why would I put myself through this?
The answer is love. Not the type of love you have for your lover or spouse. But a love that runs much deeper and much truer to our very existence on this planet. When you have a child, or adopt a child, that little person puts their whole trust, their whole life, their whole little heart in your hands. This is the greatest responsibility one could ever hold. You love that little being with an energy so great that you feel you could stop a meteor in its tracks. It is a love of letting go, non-attachment, impermanence.
The thing about kids is that they are actually pretty great. I know that parents complain about the day to day nuisances. And I am guilty of this as much as anyone. But maybe we have to have those days of disaster to balance out the days of bliss. If everything about being a parent were easy, it would not be worth it. And our population would be even more insane than it is. Isn’t it the greatest feeling when you little one wants to hold your hand? When they drop an impromptu “I love you” in the middle of dinner? When they laugh at your jokes while you play with them on a rainy afternoon. When they are sick and all they want is you because you are their world?
Children are everything. The reason we continue to learn and grow even as adults. The reason we love so deeply. The reason why we are elbows deep in a diaper at 3 a.m. The reason we let go of selfish wants. Even though it is easy to side with the negative when your child is face down on the floor throwing a tantrum at the Children’s Museum (true story) it is all worth it. And it is everything we have, the very reason we exist on this little planet of ours. It is love.